Hearts on the Spectrum: Walking Our Autism Journey
A Mother’s Journey to Empower Communication
A Great Journey Starts with a Single Step
For us, that step began right in our living room — with in-home ABA therapy. I was always present, watching, learning, absorbing everything I could. It was during those early sessions that Jacob’s BCBA (Board Certified Behavior Analyst — a professional with a master’s degree in applied behavior analysis) gently introduced me to a concept I hadn’t fully understood before: generalization.
She explained how, for many children on the spectrum, recognizing that one concept can appear in multiple forms can be incredibly challenging. To Jacob, three different picture cards showing three different cups weren’t all “cups.” They were entirely different things.
That truth settled into my heart in a powerful way.
This wasn’t just about flashcards or therapy tools. This was about how Jacob experienced the world — not just now, but as he grew. I wanted to do more than support him with pre-made visuals. I wanted to help him build real, flexible understanding. So I began creating custom PECS just for him — hyper-personalized, precise, built around his life.
Not just “cup,” but his blue sippy cup.
Not just “car,” but the exact orange car he lined up every morning.
Each card became more than a communication tool — it became a stepping stone to connection. And with every step forward, a new idea began to take root…
The Time Before ABA
Before ABA therapy began, there was a real sense of loss — not knowing how to help Jacob in the ways he needed. I never hesitated to try ABA because I knew I would be there every step of the way. Having the therapy happen at home made the process feel more personal and safe, especially for Jacob.
After just a few weeks, as I watched Jacob begin to thrive using PECS, I found myself wishing I had known about them sooner. They were such a powerful tool — his eyes lit up the first time he made a request using a picture.
For any caregivers reading this: you don’t have to wait for a diagnosis to begin helping your child. If I had known that earlier, I would’ve started our communication journey long before the official paperwork.
Generalization In Real Life
The concept of generalization also helped unlock something beautiful in Jacob. One of the earliest breakthroughs was with identifying people. At first, everyone was “Mama.” But with consistent work using picture cards of individual family members and familiar people, Jacob began recognizing and naming them correctly. Watching that transformation was nothing short of amazing — it wasn’t just cognitive, it was deeply relational.
The Struggles & Sparks: A Little Potty, A Huge Victory
Some of the hardest parts of this journey don’t come from the “big” moments. They come from the quiet, everyday tasks that many take for granted. One of those, for us, was potty training.
Jacob was four, almost five, and still in pull-ups. I had tried several times to train him myself, hoping something might click, but he wanted absolutely nothing to do with his little potty. Sitting on it brought discomfort, confusion, and resistance. And for a while, I truly wondered if this milestone would ever come.
But then came our breakthrough — not in a flash, but through teamwork, intention, and a plan built just for him.
Potty Training Boot Camp: Our Week-Long Plan
With the help of his BCBA, we designed what we lovingly called our Potty Training Boot Camp — a visual-based, one-week program tailored around Jacob’s strengths, needs, and motivators. His therapist emphasized consistency: one focused week, no distractions, no second-guessing.
Day 1: We introduced visuals and rewards. We added a cute “Pee pee puddle” picture card Jacob could place into the potty picture, and a picture of his reward — a single Starburst. The visuals helped him link the action to the outcome.
Day 2: He grasped the concept. If he sat and tried — even just a little — he’d earn his reward. He was starting to understand the process and gain confidence.
Day 3: Going pee pee in the potty was a victory and so now the time came to tackle the bigger challenge: bowel movements. We introduced his favorite sensory tools — Squishies! — as the reward for going #2 in the potty. We used pictures of the squishies and a visual reward and a poopy emoji in the potty so Jacob could clearly see the new goal.
Day 4–7: There were some accidents, of course. But by the end of the week, Jacob was fully using the potty — for both #1 and #2, no more pull ups he graduated into his big boy undies — independently and confidently he was using the potty on his own.
Recommendations
Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate, I earn a commission from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you. I only recommend tools and resources that I have personally used with Jacob or believe can help other families on their journey.
Thank you for supporting Hearts on the Spectrum.
BabyBjörn Potty Chair
Why I love this potty!
This is the potty we decided to use for Jacobs Potty Training Boot Camp — and it made all the difference.
First, this potty chair has a high back and curved armrests. Jacob found comfort and security with this design; he could lean back without worrying about tipping over, which allowed him to relax and take his time.
Another feature I love is the sturdy construction and rubber bottom. I didn’t have to worry about the potty slipping around on our tile floor.
Cleaning was a breeze thanks to the easy-to-remove inner white insert: lift it out, dump, rinse, and it’s ready to go again.
And perhaps most importantly (especially for us boy moms!), the high splashguard kept everything in the potty — no unexpected messes spraying out onto the floor.
I personally give this potty a solid 5-star review!
Potty Training Tip
For us, allowing Jacob to sit on the potty, relax, and take his time was essential. It made the process less scary and more manageable for him. Having some fun, distracting “potty time” items nearby was also incredibly helpful. These gave him a chance to settle in, feel comfortable, and try.
As soon as he went, we made it a big deal — celebrating with praise and excitement: “Great job! Look, you did it! Here’s your reward!” His motivation to try again — and go more often — came quickly after that.
Some Great Potty-Time Tools
Here are a few items that helped make potty time more manageable and even enjoyable:
A Potty Reward Chart for visual motivation
Visual timer for routine and structure Jacob’s Visual Timer
A basket of books and toys to help him relax
Step-by-step visuals like:
Go to the potty
Pull down pants
Sit down
Let’s try
Wash hands
Get reward
The Power of Rewards
For urination, we kept it simple: one Starburst — whether it was a drop or a full stream.
But bowel movements was another level, so the reward needed to be extra special! That’s when the squishy toys were introduced. Yes a whole big beautiful bucket of Mochi Squishy Toys! — soft, colorful, and adorably shaped like animals and snacks. Jacob loved them, and they gave him the motivation he needed. He still treasures them today — they now live in his “Treasure Box.”
Mochi Squishy Toys
Here’s the exact bucket of squishy toys I personally used with Jacob and recommend: Mochi Squishy Toys. They are soft, stretchy, colorful, and come in adorable designs like animals and food treats. These not only helped Jacob with potty training — they remain one of his favorite toys to this day, and are still a great motivational tools for treasure box!
From Pull-Ups to Possibility
By the end of that week, with persistence, visuals, rewards, and — most importantly — Jacob’s own determination, he was fully potty trained.
He knew every step. He owned it. We reached a moment I once thought might never come.
That milestone taught me something powerful: with the right support, every individual can succeed — in their own time, in their own way.
And that was only the beginning.
Expanding Our Toolkit
As Jacob blossomed, new tools entered our world. His PECS cards gave him a voice. His First Then Board helped him understand and follow through with tasks. Daily Visual Routines went up around the house to simplify each day’s flow. Token Boards introduced patience and perseverance.
Slowly, our days began to feel more structured, less overwhelming.
With each word, a curtain lifted.
With every new step, a window opened.
With every breakthrough, a door unlocked.
Not perfection. Not a formula. But the gentle unfolding of a child into who he already was, and always has been.
Faith After Loss
Faith became my anchor in a storm I never expected to face. Having recently lost my mother to COVID-19, a piece of my world went quiet. I was navigating grief, motherhood, and autism all at once without the comfort of her advice or support. She was my sounding board, my guide, the one I turned to in moments of doubt — and now I was walking a path I’d never imagined, without her voice on the other end of the phone. I often longed for her wisdom, her calm reassurance when the days felt too heavy.
But in that silence, God spoke.
I leaned into Jesus more deeply than ever before. I wept out in prayer during long nights, whispered deep grateful thank you’s during tiny wins, and held tightly to the promise that I was never truly alone. His presence met me exactly where I was — and I could meet Jacob exactly where he was, where he need me to be, in the therapy sessions, in the meltdowns, in the tiny miracles that filled our home.
Every single day, He showed up. And I began to understand that while I didn’t have my mom beside me, I had something just as steady: the unshakable grace of God, guiding my hands, softening my heart, and reminding me that I was chosen to be Jacob’s mom — not by accident, but with divine purpose.
A Shift in my Heart to take Action
A quiet shift began to take place.
The storm I had been navigating started to calm, and a peaceful sense of purpose gently rippled in. The moments of hope and progress that once felt fleeting began to take deeper root — transforming what had been worry into something new: purposeful action.
In the stillness that followed those breakthroughs, I began to wonder:
What if other families could experience this too?
What if I could share not just Jacob’s journey, but the tools, the visuals, the prayers — all the things that made a difference?
That’s when the seed of Hearts on the Spectrum was planted. It wasn’t a business plan or a grand idea — just a quiet nudge from God, a whisper in my spirit. For more than a year, I waited, prayed, and gathered wisdom, unsure of when or how to take the next step.
But as Jacob began to thrive, I knew the seed wasn’t meant to stay buried.
God was growing it into something far greater than me:
A space to share hope, faith, encouragement, and real-life resources with other families walking this path.
For The Parents Walking This Journey
To the parents walking this journey — whether you’re just beginning or deep in the trenches — I want you to hear this:
You are not alone.
This path can feel lonely, confusing, even isolating at times. There are days when you may question everything — your decisions, your strength, your ability to keep going. But please know: your love is enough. Your presence is powerful. Your advocacy is changing your child’s world, even if it doesn’t always feel like it.
There is purpose in your path.
There is beauty in the messy middle.
And there is hope in your home, even on the hard days.
And I want you to know — I’m here. I’ve walked this road with tears in my eyes and praise in my heart. I’ve felt the sting of uncertainty and the warmth of breakthrough. And I created Hearts on the Spectrum so that no other family would feel they had to do this alone.
If you need encouragement, resources, a safe space to ask questions, or just someone to say, “I get it” — I’m here.
Let’s walk this path together.
2 Corinthians 3:18 reminds us:
“And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.”
Note From The Heart
I’m not a medical professional or therapist — I am a mom walking this journey alongside my amazing child, who is diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder and a Speech Disability. Everything I share comes from our personal experiences, deep love, and what I’ve learned along the way.
Please always consult with qualified professionals for guidance tailored to your child and family’s unique needs.
But know this: You are not alone. You are doing better than you think. And miracles? They’re still happening.
